Paul tagged me with this meme. I was only supposed to pick 5 and do them, but I was a little bored at work today so I filled them all out.

The "questions": If I could be a scientist...If I could be a farmer...If I could be a musician...If I could be a doctor...If I could be a painter...If I could be a gardener...If I could be a missionary...If I could be a chef...If I could be an architect...If I could be a linguist...If I could be a psychologist...If I could be a librarian...If I could be an athlete...If I could be a lawyer...If I could be an inn-keeper...If I could be a professor...If I could be a writer...If I could be a llama-rider...If I could be a bonnie pirate...If I could be an astronaut...If I could be a world famous blogger...If I could be a justice on any one court in the world...If I could be married to any current famous political figure...If I could be an actor...If I could be a criminal...

My answers:

If I could be a scientist...I would travel the world to new viral outbreaks! Wear the yellow suit with attached air hoses and everything. I would have my mobile lad unit with little vials and tubes to play with. And my diamond edge scalpel so that I could cut actual cells in half! It would be awesome!

If I could be a farmer...I would marry a big strong husband and have lots of sons so I wouldn't have to go play in the dirt. But I would cook them great home cooked home grown meals every night. I am assuming here that the ability to cook great home cooked deep fat fried meals automatically comes with being a farmer's wife.

If I could be a musician...I would play at Carnegie Hall-once. Then I would retire so I would retire with my love of music intact.

If I could be a doctor...I would love to work in a neonatal unit, but I am not strong enough.

If I could be a painter...I would only paint nudes.

If I could be a gardener...I would plant the world with sunflowers! No really, I wouldn't be a gardener. There might be bugs, or dirt, or mud, or a worm!

If I could be a missionary...I would suck because I would teach that God is a maybe, decide for yourself.

If I could be a chef...I would try to make healthy meals for people who don't like vegetables. Healthy meatatarians! I know, I dream.

If I could be an architect...I would design the greatest theaters for stage plays in the world! Arched ceilings, intricate detail, and perfect acoustics all in one building.

If I could be a linguist...I would. . . .let's see. . . .nope, can't think of one thing I would like to do as a linguist.

If I could be a psychologist...I would be a marriage counselor. Imagine the stories I would have to tell at parties! With fake names of course.

If I could be a librarian...I would never get my work done because I would always be reading what I was supposed to be sorting, shelving, binding, etc.

If I could be an athlete...I would be an Olympic Gymnast without the eating disorders!

If I could be a lawyer...I would be a civil rights attorney. The really annoying kind that is always in your face! Good thing I'm not like that now.

If I could be an inn-keeper...I would have given Mary and Joseph a room!

If I could be a professor...I would teach a college literature course on children's and young adult literature. It would be the coolest class ever!

If I could be a writer...I would write books that would make people think! And not make them think about my own ideas, I would write so they would have to come up with their own ideas. And as you can tell from this, I am far from a writer right now!

If I could be a llama-rider...I would be the first Llama rider to win the triple crown! It would be a very exceptional Llama.

If I could be a bonnie pirate...I would be the Captain of a ship full of sea hardened men who work in the salt spray with their shirts off. . . . .Mmmmmmm. . . .

If I could be an astronaut...I would be the female version of Captain Picard! Yay!

If I could be a world famous blogger...I would try and turn it into a book because I don't make money from blogging!

If I could be a justice on any one court in the world. . . .I would be on the US Supreme Court. That way if something came my way that I didn't want to work on, I could say no . . .

If I could be married to any current famous political figure...does prince William count as political?

If I could be an actor...I would make people laugh while making myself rich!

If I could be a criminal...I would be the best finesse criminal there is! I would be able to steel the diamond ring you were wearing without you even noticing it was off your hand. I would be able to get into any building anywhere with my great feats of silence, skill and strength. They would make a Masterminds episode about me on Court TV!